Psychology

Auto Added by WPeMatico

How to Say No When You Feel You Can Only Say Yes

How to Say No When You Feel You Can Only Say Yes

Psychology
For years, I was a serial people pleaser. Known as someone who would step up, I would gladly make time especially when it came to volunteering for certain causes. I proudly carried this role all through grade school, college, even through law school. For years, I thought saying “no” meant I would disappoint a good friend or someone I respected. But somewhere along the way I noticed I wasn’t quite living my life. Instead, I seem to have created a schedule that was a strange combination of meeting the expectations of others, what I thought I should be doing, and some of what I actually wanted to do. The result? I had a packed schedule that left me overwhelmed and unfulfilled. It took a long while but I learned the art of saying no. Saying ‘no’ meant I no longer catered fully to
Anxiety Symptoms That Many People Overlook

Anxiety Symptoms That Many People Overlook

Psychology
“Anxious” is a word with two faces. Sometimes it means eager excitement. “I’m anxious to see you!” we say, as we get off the phone with a friend who’s coming to visit. The other side of “anxious” is a bit darker: “I’m anxious about that test,” we say, when we’re worried about the results. We call the second meaning “anxiety,” and most of us experience it from time to time. In common usage, both meanings of “anxious” describe our responses to fleeting, time-limited events. But anxiety can also have a much more powerful grip on many of us. Without the right kind of attention, it can rule our lives. I’m a psychotherapist in private practice north of Boston, Massachusetts, and I’ve worked with many clients who have anxiety. In this, the first of two articles on a psychotherapist’s vi
How a Lot of People Misunderstand Unconditional Love

How a Lot of People Misunderstand Unconditional Love

Psychology
Unconditional love doesn’t happen right away. At the beginning of a romantic relationship, a ton of superficial factors come into play that draw you to another person and make you feel like you’ve fallen in love. New love is always conditional The first thing that grabs your attention is probably something like: their beautiful eyes or cute laugh. As the two of you get to know each other you learn that you have the same taste in music or that you both love the same type of food. You can’t get enough of this person and find all of their little quirks endearing. This excitement makes you feel like you’re in love. But this isn’t unconditional love; it’s infatuation. In fact, it’s conditional love and relies entirely upon these superficial characteristics. As the relationship grow
8 Common Words You Don’t Know Are Making You Sound Unreliable

8 Common Words You Don’t Know Are Making You Sound Unreliable

Psychology
Communication becomes more casual every day. Ten years ago, we never would have felt comfortable including a smiley face in an email to our boss, but now in 2017, that seems less unprofessional. While speaking and writing tend to have different guidelines, we still tend to have more fillers when speaking vs. typing a social media post or a quick message to a coworker. When we speak, we tend to allow ourselves more fillers; I’ll never forget the time one of my professors in college asked us to count the number of times we said, “like” in one day. Maybe I was hyper-aware, but the number was astronomical. While it may seem like a small thing at first, the amount of times we use filler words like “um” or “like” in a conversation can make us appeal unreliable, no matter how educat
How Robby Takac from the Goo Goo Dolls and Other Artists Deal with Stress

How Robby Takac from the Goo Goo Dolls and Other Artists Deal with Stress

Psychology
When it is your job to create art and entertainment everyday people, it can be downright stressful at times to push forward. Sometimes pressure comes from the business end, as commercial expectations must be met. Sometimes pressure comes from a deadline or tough timeline. And sometimes pressure comes from within. Regardless of where that stress comes from, a positive approach is often key to finishing the task at hand. To learn more about how some very creative people stay both positive and productive, I spoke to seven artists on behalf of Lifehack.org. Robby Takac, Goo Goo Dolls Bassist/Vocalist & Founder Of Music Is Art: I just try to remember that not every idea is the best in its raw form, but most ideas are worth pursuing. If it doesn’t pan out, there’s nothing wrong
20 Best Movies That Will Make Your Children Smarter, Happier, and More Mature

20 Best Movies That Will Make Your Children Smarter, Happier, and More Mature

Psychology
Joseph Campbell, author of The Hero with a Thousand Faces, found that all stories consist of a common structural element found universally in myths, fairy tales, dreams, and movies. They are collectively known as The Hero’s Journey. [1] It demonstrates that every story has a different lesson; and in every journey there’s a hero — you are the hero in your own life and in your own journey. As a parent, we should find those movies and explain the lessons to our children. These life lessons will inspire children to change the world. Let’s see how movies deal with childlike universal questions and bring us powerful life lessons. Let us now take a look at 20 movies you should watch with your children and the life lessons they provide us. 1. How to Train Your Dragon: Be Yourself
Empathy vs Sympathy: Why Some People Are More Likeable Than Others

Empathy vs Sympathy: Why Some People Are More Likeable Than Others

Psychology
Several years ago I went through a gut-wrenching break-up. It was traumatic, painful and devastating. The one bright spot amidst the tears and heartache was the understanding, devotion and genuine care displayed by my family and friends as I went through the healing process. It meant the world to me. Several months later one of my family members fell ill. Once again I turned to my support system. This time, however, their response was a bit different. It wasn’t that they didn’t care per se, they expressed their feelings a bit differently. I sensed that they couldn’t quite feel where I was coming from. They seem to be more understanding and emotionally supportive during my break up. Their lukewarm and slightly distant responses left me feeling angry, confused and hurt. This ex
Turn off These 6 Dangerous Inner Dialogues That Kills Your Brain Power

Turn off These 6 Dangerous Inner Dialogues That Kills Your Brain Power

Psychology
Have you ever had an internal dialogue playing on loop in your brain? Your mind seems to be always working even when things are quiet. We don’t only use this dialogue to solve problems, we also spend part of our time having an internal conversation with ourselves. We have a world happening inside our heads replete with catch phrases and mantras. Most of us don’t even realize that we’re having this conversation. Michael Singer, author of The Untethered Soul, likens this mental chatter to our “inner roommate.” Your inner roommate is the voice in the back of your head narrating your life for you. This voice might be offering you positive affirmations such as, “I am strong and capable,” or “I can handle change.” This voice could also have catch phrases like, “I’m not good enough,
What Makes a Person Boring

What Makes a Person Boring

Psychology
I have interviewed over 100 people for a number of positions. It’s always exciting to talk with driven candidates, but sometimes I will admit that I have to fight the urge to yawn during an interview. The last thing that you want to do at an interview or at a social event is lull your audience to sleep. Regardless of context, when I’m getting to know someone, I want to hear stories about different aspects of the person’s life. I want to know what is happening with them so that I can understand how they face adversity and measure their own success. Sometimes I walk away from a conversation feeling completely bowled over by a person’s personality and accomplishments. Other times, the interaction has little impact, and I have trouble remembering the individual later. Nobody wants to be the fo
How to Harness the Creative Power of Constructive Conflict

How to Harness the Creative Power of Constructive Conflict

Psychology
Conflict is everywhere. There always seems to be an argument about politics, religion, or generational gaps on social media and late night television. What if these disagreements could be productive?  On social media and late night television we see never-ending arguments about politics, religion, or generational gaps. What if these disagreements were productive? Conflict is necessary for creativity and development; however, it has to be constructive. America was founded on combining old ways of thinking and producing something new. The idea isn’t to compromise, but to take the different perspectives and create hybrids. Constructive conflict could even resolve the seemingly elusive healthcare issue that has divided our nation. There are two stages to harness constructive conflict successfu